Beeleeba: November 2010

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Divorce rate

Last post started from the thought of the upcoming office Christmas party which generated the thought about divorces which drove me to look up divorce rates in the Nordic countries. Not very surprisingly, the divorce rate in Scandinavia is the highest in the world. Only Norway has the lowest divorce rate among Scandinavian countries at about 42%.

Sweden 55%
Finland 52%
Denmark 46%
Norway 42%

I forgot to look up Iceland, but anyway…

So basically we could safely assume that almost half the marriages will end up in a divorce. This happens in Scandinavia where people marry usually very late after they’ve already been living for years together and had several children together. If a marriage is to happen so late, we would assume is very unlikely to end up in a divorce. And it still does, for 50% of the marriages.

In the 50% that’s left of the marriages we can still assume that there is some percentage that don’t get along and would end up in a divorce if it wasn’t for the kids or other things that make them reconsider the divorce. But those people are still unhappy and on their way to divorce so we could assume that actually the percentage of marriages that fail is greater than the ones that succeed.

With these percentages in mind, I’m thinking that “until death do us part” doesn’t make much sense anymore besides it actually being a stupid old phrase. Turns out there’s a greater chance that something else will get in the way before death gets there. So maybe the whole attitude towards marriage it’s not the right one.

Seems that marriage does not have the same significance it had hundred of years ago (at least not in the developed countries, we should not forget that India still has a 1.1% divorce rate Smile ).

Marriage it’s not a bond for life anymore, but more a way of celebrating the fact that after a long time spent together, two people are still able to love each other and be part of each other’s life. And that’s actually quite an accomplishment.

With every more year spent together people should be happy and grateful that they are still together. If you think like that it’s much harder to take your partner for granted as it usually happens in marriages (because of the “till death do us part” thing). If you scratch that phrase and replace it with “till we are not happy together anymore”, then since you know that your partner will leave you once he/she’s not happy anymore or you could do the same thing, I think it’s going to be much easier to appreciate and be grateful for your partner and your happiness.

qed Smile

Fact #2 about Denmark: Best time to buy a house

This is funny, but as Homer would say: “It’s funny cause it’s true”.

One of the first things I learned after coming to Denmark was that Danes get very very crazy at the Christmas parties, crazy drunk that is. And when you’re drunk like that most of your inhibitions disappear.The result is that married people end up having sex with other married (but not to each other) people from the aforementioned parties.

Thus, the best time to buy a house in Denmark is after Christmas because that means that the wild Christmas party sex happened and people are getting divorced and in a hurry to sell their house and split the earnings.

I guess this was true mostly before the financial crisis, but you never know … Smile

Monday, November 22, 2010

The Big Bang theory

So last Sunday was a lazy lazy Sunday in which I started watching “The Big Bang theory” after one of my ~~geek~~ friends couldn’t stop talking about it … Winking smile

A bit annoying at the beginning, it turned out to be the funniest shit I’ve watched in a long time. Going to my top favorite comedy series along South Park.

Four geeks and a girl as main characters along with some other sporadically appearing characters most of the them from the geek side also or just the odd kind of people side.

My favorite bits: when Howard (Jewish engineer with a Masters from MIT who still lives with his mother) and Raj (Indian astrophysicist who cannot speak when girls are present unless he’s drunk) are confronted by Leonard’s mother about their imaginary homo marriage. Her theory is that because these guys could not get girls they have created a gay marriage between them to compensate for their need for affection. Of course the guys are desperate to prove her wrong (because of course they’re not gay).

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Depression awareness

I am still shocked over a news I found out yesterday about a former college colleague of ours who died this week by committing suicide. It’s only 2 entries apart from my posting about the death of my cousin and I know my blog is going to become depressing, but I feel so sad about the news that I wanted to write it down. I didn’t know her very well before, we spoke a little during college, shared the same classes and went to a couple of parties together, but she was a person you could not not notice. Very bright, loud and joyful with that specific intelligent sparkle in her eyes. It’s so sad that she’s already gone without having enough time to show the world her brightness and intelligence.

I didn’t know before because we didn’t stay in touch at all, but she had a blog, parts of which I read yesterday. Really interesting writing, she was so very talented. I think a good part of it was written during her depression years, it is about her battle and it feels a bit depressing or maybe it is like that because we know she’s not here anymore and because her life’s end was so tragic, she lost the battle.

Rest in peace Ana, http://afreuda.wordpress.com

I wanted this post to be about her and about the disease that I dread so much and that doesn’t have merely enough awareness – depression. And about the way people look (judge) at other people who are affected by this disease.

You see, Ana was studying psychology during her last years, almost her entire blog is about this. Would you think that a shrink would be able to commit suicide? You wouldn’t expect that a girl who studies psychology would be able to be depressed, right? But would you expect a doctor that treats cancer patients, to get cancer? That of course it can happen, cancer can affect anyone.

And depression can affect anyone. It is a disease. It’s not a choice.

She knew she was sick, she didn’t see it like something was wrong with her, she was still the same person as before, but suffering from this disease.

Her blog describes very well the way she felt and the pain that felt almost physical. It was like her brain was defected, she knew it was defected and that she has to fight it, but she just couldn’t control it. She took medications, consulted doctors and shrinks. She did everything.

What I am the most annoyed with is the way people look upon this disease.People that think it’s just a sign of weakness and if you “quit being stupid” you could easily snap out of it. Can you do that with cancer? WTF.

And the way people look upon the ones who die by committing suicide. Like it is a sin. Well, taking the word “sin” literally is a sin, but that is wrong. Depression is not a choice and thus taking your own life because you were affected by depression is not a choice. Why should this be a sin? Why should you condemn anyone because he was sick? Isn’t this just another discrimination created by old narrow minds?

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Fact #1 about DK - Cycling in heels

It’s not uncommon in Denmark for women to cycle wearing heels and mini skirts. If you ever visited Copenhagen during the summer and if you’re a guy, this would have been probably one of the first things to notice.